SADDED!!!

hmm...wat i wana sae???im utterly disappointed w myself...DISAPPOINTED...haix...i din do well in my prac at all..i duno wat to sae...i cud nt do gram stain..the most basic ting..streaking was ok for me..i did it well!!bt gram stain??haix...bt it came to me tt many ppl din do well in gram stain as well..either they had prob with microscopy or entirely with gram stain..ESP ppl holding specimen B..the one i was holding..it was a relieve in a way..u noe..i felt better..cos im nt the onli one..then i was nervous..i din do well for viral stuff as well..as in..that particular qn,i mixed up with the 1st qn...oh man!!how STUPID can i b???itz entirely 2 diff qn..jz bcos i nervous..i tot it was the SAME qn..sad..for no reason i lose at least 2mks..it was abt virus..

Qn 1: How can u tell that patient is suffering fr VIRAL infection?
ANS:that there is an increase in lymphocytes than other WBC. This is part of my ans.

Qn2:Wat OTHER info tell u tt patient is suffering fr EBV infection from the results shown(Haem report)?
ANS: im suppose to write dn the same ans as above. High WBC,high LYMPHOCYTES. They shld b part of my ans.

N i was nervous..i ws tinkg,they cant possibly ask same qn wat..so i tot look for other info..in the end,i left out the lymphocytes ans..walao..wan to cry cannot cry..lidat i lost 7marks..5marks deducted cos i went to look at demo slides-the best way out..if nt my whole paper gone..sacrifice sum marks to help me..no choice...i broke a slide,failed 2 slides..watz happening to me??and the whole day...i was in a dazed..i cud nt pay attn in lectures..i kept yakking abt it..i hv nt much appetite..i noe..c'mon.itz onli 15% rite...bt it means a lot to me..im so scare..no matter hw i calculated,if i cant get into credit,i wud jz get a pass...i dn wan tt...i dn wan to live life like when i was in TP..jz pass wud do..i wana excel..bt it has been makin me reli tired n stress out..haix..

i hv totally lost ctrl of my emotions...i duno when i shld b hapi,n when nt to..when im angry,unhapi etc..i kept it to myself..i appeared hapi in front..when im hapi etc..i dare nt reli show out as well..was afraid ppl might tink im crazy,or showing off..being a human is hard..sumtime i wish i cud b a dog..able to express my feelings jz fr my tail...HAHA..

oh well...oh well!!tink during my study week,i muz study reli reli hard...planned to go sch library to study..EVERYDAY!!stayin at hm wud mk me very slack n lazy..NO!!i cant...i hv prayed..and i noe God wud help me to be motivated n study well n hard..HE wud b thr for me..Even today...i noe he is helping me..if he doesn't,i wudn't hv pass the streak plate,nor able to do the virus qn..All goes to his guidance..im alr v hapi..im jz sad cos once again,i hv failed gram stain..n i realised is eva since after attachment..b4 tt i was doing great w gram stain..hmm..*ponders*..isit psychological??

OK..end of sad stuff...nxt post shall b sth beta...HAHA